So That Happened: #RAW Recap (05/19/14)

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RAW begins with its usual intro, but quickly morphs into Bray Wyatt leading the WWE Universe in singing “He’s Got The Whole Word.”

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Bray Wyatt tells the WWE Universe that he wants them to share this with him, then sings “He’s Got The Whole Word” again.

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Bray Wyatt says every night we lay our heads down to dream, and that’s when our minds really start to tick. Wyatt says we start remembering all of the horrible things that happened in our lives, but in our dreams we are superheroes that can fix everything because we dream of revenge and Payback.

Bray Wyatt says we wake up and reality starts to set in, and that we remember that we’re not superheroes that can fix everything. Bray Wyatt says we bottle up our rage and live like nothing is wrong, but everything is wrong.

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Bray Wyatt says he plans on fixing this, then tells a story about a mean old teacher that used to look down on him and make sure he knew he was a piece of trash. Bray says the teacher thought everything she read in a book was true and everything Wyatt said was a lie. Bray says he asked Ms. Teacherlady what made her think she was better/smarter than him and look down on children and force feed them propaganda.

Bray Wyatt says Ms. Teacherlady told him that he was rotten, stood for nothing and that the first time she looked in his eyes, she knew he was evil. Wyatt starts laughing, but says that he’s proud to say that Ms. Teacherlady is sitting in a nursing home thinking about her past regrets, while he stands before you, a ruler, a conqueror, and a revolutionary with the whole world in his hands.

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Bray Wyatt says that was his Payback, but Ms. Teacherlady was right about one thing: He is evil. Bray calls himself the necessary evil that must exist in this world to balance everything out. Bray calls his tongue the “Scorpion’s Tail” because when he opens it, people start getting behind him. Wyatt switches his attention to John Cena saying that Cena hides behind his plastic smile while everything around Cena burns.

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After a loud “Cena Sucks” chant, Bray Wyatt says at Payback, this fairytale will end. Wyatt promises that he will be the Last Man Standing, or no one will ever stand again. Bray Wyatt promises that tonight Luke Harper will put John Cena down. Wyatt continues to taunt Cena until Cena’s music plays.

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Luke Harper and Erick Rowan run out the ring to prepare for John Cena, but Cena comes through the crowd and hits Bray Wyatt with the AA.

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Luke Harper and Erick Rowan run back into the ring, but it’s too late. John Cena taunts The Wyatt Family as he goes up the ramp.

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So That Happened: #TotalDivas Recap (05/18/14)

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Total Divas begins with a recap of Naomi’s eye injury from Aksana. Naomi ends up finishing the match.

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The Total Divas watch Naomi and Jimmy Uso go immediately to the trainer. Eva Marie is concerned since she has never seen Naomi injured, while Cam’ron worries what this means for the Funkadactyls. Cam’ron is also worried about Naomi’s health.

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Snapshots: Ring Of Honor Presents: #WarOfTheWorlds

In Snapshots, 3MBooth searches for images to share.

Tonight, Ring Of Honor presents New Japan vs. Ring Of Honor in War Of The Worlds at the Hammerstein Ballroom and on iPPV.

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The IWC: Box Brown and Andre The Giant

3MB wants to Highlight The IWC; No Not that IWC. The Illustrated Wrestling Community 

Wrestling has always been a combination of truth and myth. Wrestlers are often billed as taller or larger than they actually are. Accolades are always exaggerated to the fullest. Ric Flair is the dirtiest player in the game. Chris Jericho, Lance Storm, Tyson Kidd and Natalya have all be dubbed, “the last survivor of the Hart Family Dungeon,” at some point in their careers. Most wrestlers had to wait until they got into the ring to get these titles (except for Mark Henry: before he was the World’s Strongest Man, he was the World’s Strongest Teenager). And then there’s Andre the Giant.

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Andre the Giant’s life has always been shrouded in a bit of myth. Everyone has an Andre the Giant story and, as we’ve pointed out, wrestlers are not above letting something like facts get in the way of a good story. Box Brown took it upon himself to tell the story of Andre in graphic novel format, which is very fitting. Describing a 7′ 4”, 550lbs giant is better with a visual aid. Unlike most Wrestlers, stories about Andre started from his youth; Brown depicts the probably very real problem Andre had going to school at age 12: the school bus refused to take him. Was he actually driven to school through the French countryside by famous playwright Samuel Beckett? I sure hope so: it makes for a much better story.

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So That Happened: #RAW Recap (05/12/14)

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RAW begins with The Shield standing in the ring.

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