So That Happened: #RAW Recap (05/19/14)

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RAW begins with its usual intro, but quickly morphs into Bray Wyatt leading the WWE Universe in singing “He’s Got The Whole Word.”

Bray Wyatt tells the WWE Universe that he wants them to share this with him, then sings “He’s Got The Whole Word” again.

wyattcellphoneCourtesy of prowrestlingnow

Bray Wyatt says every night we lay our heads down to dream, and that’s when our minds really start to tick. Wyatt says we start remembering all of the horrible things that happened in our lives, but in our dreams we are superheroes that can fix everything because we dream of revenge and Payback.

Bray Wyatt says we wake up and reality starts to set in, and that we remember that we’re not superheroes that can fix everything. Bray Wyatt says we bottle up our rage and live like nothing is wrong, but everything is wrong.

Bray Wyatt says he plans on fixing this, then tells a story about a mean old teacher that used to look down on him and make sure he knew he was a piece of trash. Bray says the teacher thought everything she read in a book was true and everything Wyatt said was a lie. Bray says he asked Ms. Teacherlady what made her think she was better/smarter than him and look down on children and force feed them propaganda.

Bray Wyatt says Ms. Teacherlady told him that he was rotten, stood for nothing and that the first time she looked in his eyes, she knew he was evil. Wyatt starts laughing, but says that he’s proud to say that Ms. Teacherlady is sitting in a nursing home thinking about her past regrets, while he stands before you, a ruler, a conqueror, and a revolutionary with the whole world in his hands.

Bray Wyatt says that was his Payback, but Ms. Teacherlady was right about one thing: He is evil. Bray calls himself the necessary evil that must exist in this world to balance everything out. Bray calls his tongue the “Scorpion’s Tail” because when he opens it, people start getting behind him. Wyatt switches his attention to John Cena saying that Cena hides behind his plastic smile while everything around Cena burns.

After a loud “Cena Sucks” chant, Bray Wyatt says at Payback, this fairytale will end. Wyatt promises that he will be the Last Man Standing, or no one will ever stand again. Bray Wyatt promises that tonight Luke Harper will put John Cena down. Wyatt continues to taunt Cena until Cena’s music plays.

Luke Harper and Erick Rowan run out the ring to prepare for John Cena, but Cena comes through the crowd and hits Bray Wyatt with the AA.

cenaaaCourtesy of prowrestlingnow

Luke Harper and Erick Rowan run back into the ring, but it’s too late. John Cena taunts The Wyatt Family as he goes up the ramp.


Cesaro and Paul Heyman Speak:

Paul Heyman introduces himself, then cuts himself off to address the WWE Universe. Heyman calls out the fans and defines their roles: Heyman says he and Cesaro are stars, while they are wannabes. Heyman says they should worship the ground Cesaro walks on and the microphone that he uses to speak.

Paul Heyman tries to say “My Client, Brock Lesnar” but the WWE Universe says it with him. Heyman stops them then does an impression of someone on their back.

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Paul Heyman says he’s not the Queen finally dying and making Prince Charles the King, he’s The Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Heyman unlike the Undertaker, he can sit up and that his client, Brock Lesnar, conquered The Undertaker’s Undefeated Streak at Wrestlemania.

Paul Heyman says tonight, the United States Champion, #ScumbagSheamus be emasculated by his client, The King Of Swing, Cesaro.

Match 01: Cesaro vs. #ScumbagSheamus

#ScumbagSheamus dives at Cesaro, but gets caught with an uppercut.

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Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

#ScumbagSheamus kicks out.

Paul Heyman distracts #ScumbagSheamus allowing Cesaro hit #ScumbagSheamus with a German Suplex.

Winner: Cesaro

Post-Match, #ScumbagSheamus tries to shake Cesaro’s hand.

Cesaro pretends to shake his hand, but walks away instead.

cesarosheamusshakeCourtesy of hiitsmekevin

Match 02: Big E vs. Ryback w/ Curtis Axel (Beat The Clock Challenge)

Ryback says that The Big Guy is bigger than Big Ben, but just like Big Ben, the time is ticking on his opponent. Ryback tells Big E, Tick Tok.

Winner: Big E.

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Match 03: R-Truth and Naomi (w/ Cameron) vs. Fandango and Layla

Summer Rae’s Music Plays!

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Summer Rae kisses Fandango.

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Summer Rae and Layla start fighting.

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Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

Fandango and Layla escape.

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Winner: Summer Rae…?

austincameronCourtesy of wrestling-giffer
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