So That Happened: #RAW Recap (03/17/14)


RAW beings with Triple H in the middle of the ring.

Triple H vows to crush the WWE Unvierse’s dreams by ending the Yes Movement and destroying Daniel Bryan. Triple H claims this is all their fault, because they (the fans) forced his hand. Triple H says he’s no longer upset, because he had a week to think about it. But at Wrestlemania, he is going to be cold, calculated and without remorse.

Triple H says he has a couple of things he’d like to say to Daniel Bryan, but he’s going to say it to his face later tonight, man to man. Triple H tries to plug the rest of the show, but Batista comes out.

Batista tells Triple H that he may have big problems with Daniel Bryan, but he has bigger problems with him. Batista complains about Daniel Bryan being in the Main Event of Wrestlemania, then says that this isn’t hat he signed up for. Batista says he’s not cool with this, and asks Triple H what he was thinking.

Triple H asks Batista if he thinks Daniel Bryan has a chance in hell of beating him, but gets interrupted by Randy Orton.

Randy Orton apologizes to Triple H because he has to agree with Batista on this one. Orton asks Triple H what he’s thinking making it possible for the Wrestlemania Main Event to become a triple threat match. Triple H asks the same question again, then says Daniel Bryan has no chance in hell of beating him and that it’s not going to happen.

Triple H asks Randy Orton and Batista if Daniel Bryan has gotten that far into their heads. Batista calls Triple H out on Daniel Bryan getting into his head. Randy Orton asks for a match against Daniel Bryan in a No-DQ match. Orton vows to beat Bryan and do what Big Dave couldn’t do last week. Triple H agrees.

Randy Orton calls out Batista by saying the reason for the YES Movement and the reason that the fans are behind Daniel Bryan is because nobody cares about Batista. Orton tells Batista that if he just lived up to his hype, they wouldn’t be in this situation, but nobody cared when he left and nobody cares now.


Batista responds to Randy Orton by saying the reason the WWE Universe loves Daniel Bryan is because Orton sucks as a Champion.

Batista tells Randy Orton that the only reason he is WWE Champion is because of Triple H. Batista calls Orton a paper champion and claims Orton wishes he could be Batista. Batista says Orton will never be Batista, and that he doesn’t deserve to hold those titles because they’re his.

Randy Orton and Batista start arguing as Triple H tries to get in between them. Triple H gives up and starts to walk away.

Batista asks Triple H where he’s going and demands that he fixes this. Triple H tells Batista that he’s sick of everything around here. Triple H is sick of Daniel Bryan and the WWE Universe cheering for him. Triple H is also sick of Hollywood Movie Stars thinking they can walk back into the WWE, acting like they know more about it than him.


Triple H is also sick of “technically gifted guys” who are so screwed up in the head, that they can’t win a match without him holding their hand.

Triple H says he’s thinking that “the old man” was right: The only person you can trust in this world is yourself. Triple H says there will be a triple threat at Wrestlemania, but Daniel Bryan won’t be in it. Triple H says when he beats Daniel Bryan, the Triple Threat Match will be Batista vs. Randy Orton vs. Triple H!


Batista complains and yells at Triple H, saying he didn’t sign up for this. Randy Orton hits the RKO on Batista then does the Orton Pose.

Backstage: Renee Young tries to talk to Batista, but Batista tells her coming back here was a big mistake. Batista walks out.

Match 01: The Usos vs. The Real Americans

Cesaro goes for the Cesaro Swing, but The Usos block it.

The Usos hit Cesaro with a Samoan Drop.

The Usos go for a dive. After diving on Swagger, Jimmy Uso tries to dive on Cesaro but gets hits with a Cesaro Uppercut.


Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

Winners: The Real Americans

Backstage: Kane tells The Shield that things got out of hand Friday Night and that all of them made regrettable decisions that could have long term consequences. Kane tells The Shield that he needs a united Shield by his side, because if he can’t count on them, then The Authority can’t count on The Shield. And if The Authority can’t count on them, then they become a liability.

Kane asks if he can count on The Shield. Seth Rollins tells Kane that they’re united and Roman Reigns says believe in that. Kane says he believes that The Shield will do the right thing when they’re asked, or they’ll find out how replaceable they really are.

Hornswoggle tries to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day with the WWE Universe by giving fans gifts.

Hornswoggle is interrupted by Bad News Barrett.

Bad News Barrett gives a brief history of St. Patrick’s Day, then says he has some bad news. The reality is most people will spend St. Patrick’s Day inebriated and spend the day drunk and vomitting. Barrett says the next they, the people will wake up hung over, and regret the decisions they made.

Match 02: #ScumbagSheamus vs. Titus O’Neil

Christian is on commentary:

The commentators make fun of Christian and Christian snaps on the commentators. Chrsitian calls out JBL calling him ugly and says Christian looks like David Spade in a Fat Suit. Christian thinks the commentators should do better at their jobs.

Titus O’Neil goes after Hornswoggle and brings him into the ring.


Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

#ScumbagSheamus throws Hornswoggle like a battering ram into Titus O’Neil.


Winner: #ScumbagSheamus

Post-Match, Renee Young congratulates #ScumbagSheamus on his victory, then asks how he’s going to spend his St. Patrick’s Day. Sheamus wishes the WWE Universe a Happy St. Patrick’s Day.

#ScumbagSheamus announces himself as an entrant in the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Christian sneaks up and attacks #ScumbagSheamus

Christian hits the Unprettier on #ScumbagSheamus

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Joe Manganiello will be at RAW Next Week:


Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

Scooby-Doo will also be appearing RAW Next Week:


Courtesy of prowrestlingnow

BookerTopCatText_3MBCourtesy of our Hanna-Barbarians post

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