So That Happened: 09/16/13

RAW begins with Justin Roberts introducing the NEWWWW WWE Champion, Daniel Bryan!

After a loud “Daniel Bryan” chant, Daniel Bryan calls the WWE Universe awesome. Daniel Bryan says he has a lot of things he could say right now, but the best thing he can say is “YES!” After leading the WWE Universe in a “YES!” chant, he is interrupted by Triple H.

Triple H tells Daniel Bryan that before he continues celebrating, he would like to address Scott Armstrong’s fast count from last night. Triple H says the fast count is what everyone in Social Media and the talent are talking about. Triple H calls Daniel Bryan’s WWE Title Victory tainted and brings out Scott Armstrong to clear up the confusion.

Triple H reviews Scott Armstrong’s counting cadence. Triple H shows footage of how Scott Armstrong normally counts and how he counted at the end of the match with Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton.

Triple H shows one more example of the counts by showing them side by side.

Triple H calls Scott Armstrong out on his incredibly fast count and asks him to explain himself. Scott Armstrong agrees that it was a fast count. Armstrong doesn’t know why he made a fast count and claims he made mistake. Triple H calls Scott Armstrong on out never making mistakes in the 15 years of knowing him. Triple H asks Scott Armstrong to tell him the truth.

Scott Armstrong turns to Triple H and says, “They got us Daniel.” Triple H catches this then orders Scott Armstrong to leave the ring. Triple H tells Daniel Bryan that he’s ashamed of him for entering in a conspiracy with Scott Armstrong in order to be the WWE Champion. Daniel Bryan denies this, but Triple H decides to hold the WWE Championship in abeyance. Triple H will not give the WWE Championship to Randy Orton, but Daniel Bryan is NO LONGER the WWE Champion.

Triple H tells Daniel Bryan that since he’s no longer the WWE Champion, he needs to hand over the WWE Championship. Daniel Bryan refuses to hand over the title. Triple H tells Daniel Bryan that he is a disgrace to his family and the WWE Championship, and says that he thought Shawn Michaels would have taught Daniel Bryan better than this.

Triple H demands that Daniel Bryan hand over the WWE Championship, or else he will take it from him.

Daniel Bryan tries to plead his case, but Triple H won’t listen. Randy Orton’s theme plays and Randy Orton rushes down to the ring. Triple H calms Randy Orton down and says there will be no fight here, and that he’s “got this.” Triple H tells Daniel Bryan that he is no longer the WWE Champion and there is no Champion. Triple H says he will get to the bottom of this, but Bryan needs to hand over the belt before Triple H takes it from him.

After a loud “NO!” chant, Daniel Bryan refuses to hand over the WWE Championship. Randy Orton hits Daniel Bryan with an RKO and Triple H takes the WWE Championship.

Backstage: Triple H and Stephanie McMahon are talking about Daniel Bryan until they are interrupted by Randy Orton. Randy Orton yells at Triple H asking what the hell is going on and the two of them get into an argument. Randy Orton demands that Triple H give him back the WWE Title until Stephanie McMahon interrupts with one of her primal “HEY’s!”

Stephanie McMahon tells Randy Orton to watch who he’s talking to because Triple H is the COO of the WWE. Stephanie says that as far as they’re concerned, Randy Orton deserved to lose last night. Stephanie asks Orton what happened to the Randy Orton of old, which had no morality or remorse that tormented her husband and gave her a DDT. Stephanie says until Randy Orton finds that version of himself again, maybe they will have to find a new face of the WWE. Triple H says that’s the guy they’re looking for then walks off.

Match 01: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dolph Ziggler hits the Zig Zag.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

Justin Roberts announces that Dean Ambrose is still the U.S. Champion

Backstage: Triple H tells Brad Maddox that he wants Daniel Bryan to face Roman Reigns tonight. Stephanie McMahon tells Big Show that she hopes that it hurt that he was suspended from Smackdown. Stephanie McMahon tells Big Show that he’s broke and he’s going to sit in Brad Maddox’s office for the night unless Stephanie needs him.

Match 02: Fandango vs. R-Truth

R-Truth does a stupid dance.

Winner: Fandango

Dusty Rhodes Speaks:

After a loud “Dusty” chant, Dusty Rhodes says that he’s not here as the American Dream tonight. He’s here as Virgil Runnels and he wants the McMahons to hear what he has to say.

Dusty Rhodes says that The McMahons have never been down a bad road, but he has. Dusty Rhodes tells the story of trying to raise two young men, but having trouble paying his light bill, rent-a-car, mortgage, or anybody to cut his lawn. Dusty said he didn’t know where the next dollar was going to come from, but he figured out a way due to the love for his sons.

Dusty Rhodes says that tonight isn’t about him. It’s about Cody Rhodes. Dusty reminds us that Cody Rhodes lost his job on a whim (if you will) because it was “Best For Business.” Dusty Rhodes talks about Goldust’s attempt to get Cody Rhodes’ job back and having two sons that he loves is what’s “Best For Business.” Dusty Rhodes says that at 22, Cody Rhodes was a former IC Champion and former multi-time tag team champion, and in one night, WWE broke his heart.

Dusty Rhodes says that he’s not here to beg for Cody Rhodes to get his job back. Dusty just wants Cody Rhodes to get an opportunity to get his job back. Dusty Rhodes says he didn’t ask to be here, he was invited by Stephanie McMahon and wants Stephanie to come out and explain what her proposition is.

Stephanie McMahon’s music plays and Stephanie walks down the ramp clapping.

Stephanie McMahon tells Dusty Rhodes that he had a remarkable speech and that her husband’s business decision to fire Triple H has been weighing on them a lot. Stephanie McMahon brings up Cody Rhodes’ wedding last week and apologizes if the firing cast a shadow over the wedding in any way. To make up for it, Stephanie McMahon gives Dusty Rhodes a gift to give Cody…A Bed, Bath and Beyond Gift Card.

Dusty Rhodes doesn’t want to hear it and just wants Stephanie McMahon to state her proposal. Stephanie McMahon says that Dusty Rhodes is a son of a plumber, but she is the daughter of a genius. Stephanie tells Dusty Rhodes that they are willing to give Cody Rhodes his job back, but they are also willing to give Goldust his job back. There’s only one spot and Dusty Rhodes must choose.

Dusty Rhodes refuses to make this decision. Stephanie McMahon tries to give Dusty a proposition, but Dusty Rhodes refuses to let Stephanie McMahon interrupt her. Stephanie McMahon tries to guilt Dusty Rhodes by saying he could either give the job to the golden boy (Cody) or the screw up (Goldust. You’d THINK Goldust would be the Golden boy.)

Dusty Rhodes gives Stephanie McMahon a hypothetical question about picking her favorites out of her daughters. Stephanie McMahon claims that Dusty Rhodes is trying to make this all about himself instead of about his children. Stephanie tells Dusty that she hopes his sons can forgive him, but Dusty tells Stephanie McMahon to go to hell. As Dusty Rhodes tries to leave, The Shield comes out. Before The Shield attacks, Stephanie McMahon says that she has someone that can even out the odds, then brings out The Big Show.

Stephanie McMahon tells Dusty Rhodes that since he couldn’t make a decision about which one of his sons could get a job, he has to make another choice: Would he prefer to be dismembered by The Shield or knocked out by The Big Show?

Dusty Rhodes refuses to make the decision, so Stephanie McMahon makes the decision for him. Stephanie McMahon orders Big Show to knock out Dusty Rhodes.

Big Show refuses to do it, so Stephanie McMahon orders The Shield to attack. Big Show stops The Shield from attacking and they go to get chairs. Big Show starts crying and tells Dusty Rhodes that he’s sorry and he doesn’t want to do this.

Stephanie McMahon orders Big Show knock out Dusty Rhodes. Big Show reluctantly knocks out Dusty Rhodes then catches him.

Stephanie McMahon pats a crying Big Show on the back then walks off as the trainer checks on Dusty Rhodes.

Backstage: Dusty Rhodes is stretchered into an ambulance. Big Show goes into the ambulance with him.

Match 03: Brie Bella and The Funkadactyls vs. Alica Fox, Aksana and Layla

AJ Lee and Natalya are on commentary. Nattie’s headset doesn’t work, but she keeps trying to talk anyway.

Winners: Brie Bella and The Funkadactyls

Post-Match, Natalya and AJ Lee continue to exchange words, then have a staredown.

Match 04: Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Winner: Rob Van Dam

Post-Match, Damien Sandow’s theme music plays?

Backstage: Scott Armstrong tries to apologize to Triple H, but Triple H stops him. Triple H says he has a problem because there is no WWE Champion right now due to Scott Armstrong’s officating. Triple H scolds Scott Armstrong about WWE Referees having integrity and says if they don’t have that, they have nothing.

After 20 years of officiating, Triple H fires Scott Armstrong and offers him a nice severance package. Scott Armstrong tries to plead his case, but Triple H tells Armstrong that he promises to take care of him.

Match 05: The Miz vs. Randy Orton

The Miz makes his entrance to a loud ovation from his hometown.

The Miz hugs his Parents, then raises his Father’s hand.

Randy Orton brutally attacks The Miz, but The Miz starts fighting back.

Randy Orton hits the DDT on the ground on The Miz.

Randy Orton picks up a chair the sticks The Miz’s head in between the chair and stomps on it.

Winner: No Contest

Paul Heyman Speaks:

Curtis Axel wheels Paul Heyman out as he comes out with Ryback then leaves.

Paul Heyman calls himself The Best In The World then mocks Cleveland for booing him. Heyman says that it must be hard for Cleveland to compare their insignificant accomplishments to his. Paul Heymain says that there isn’t a person in the arena that can make this statement: “I. PINNED. CM PUNK.” Heyman says no matter how many times that he says this, it will always be the truth.

Paul Heyman says that the record books will forever state that he won the handicap match against CM Punk. Heyman says that he wish he had a master plan, but is caught off guard by a Goldberg chant. Paul Heyman says he didn’t have a backup plan and that CM Punk gave him the most vicious beating in WWE history. Despite being in a wheelchair, he is still here and will continue to torment CM Punk and the WWE Universe, thanks the “big, beautiful man” known as Ryback. Paul Heyman tells Ryback that he owes his life to him.

Ryback says that if there’s one thing he can’t stand, it’s a “bowley.” Ryback calls CM Punk out on “bowelying” Paul Heyman last night. Ryback says that he doesn’t like anything about CM Punk and that he is a “bowley.” Ryback claims he’s here to stop CM Punk. Ryback tells Paul Heyman that he never has to worry again, because as long as he’s here, CM Punk will never put his hands on him again.

Paul Heyman kisses Ryback on the cheek as the crowd is disgusted.

Match 06: The Usos vs. The Real Americans vs. Tons Of Funk

Tons Of Funk Have Been Eliminated…The WWE Universe starts chanting for commentators….again.

Jack Swagger hits a Top Rope Belly-To-Belly on Jimmy Uso, but doesn’t know that Jey Uso tagged himself in. Jey Uso hits the Uso Splash on Swagger.

Winners: The Usos

An update on The Miz and Dusty Rhodes’ Conditions:

Backstage: Daniel Bryan gets support from Justin Gabriel, Kofi Kingston and R-Truth.

Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella hug each other.

Dolph Ziggler, Zack Ryder, Rob Van Dam offer support for Daniel Bryan.

Match 08: Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Randy Orton comes down to ringside.

Randy Orton sits in a chair and watches the match.

Seth Rollin’s managing is very audible:

Roman Reigns catches Daniel Bryan.

Seth Rollins tries to interfere, but Daniel Bryan dropkicks him.

Daniel Bryan hits the “YES!” Lock on Roman Reigns, but The Shield interferes.

Winner: Daniel Bryan (via DQ)

Post-Match, Daniel Bryan tries to fight off The Shield and Randy Orton, but gets attacked.

Dolph Ziggler, Rob Van Dam, Kofi Kingston, Justin Gabriel, The Prime Time Players and R-Truth come out.

The Superstars brawl with The Shield and Randy Orton!

Somehow Kofi Kingston gets speared by Roman Reigns….

Daniel Bryan and The Superstars clear the ring of The Shield and Randy Orton! The WWE Superstars lift Daniel Bryan up and chant “YES!” along with him and the WWE Universe.

So That Happened:

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