So That Happened: 07/29/13

RAW begins with Mr. McMahon and Brad Maddox walking to the ring.

Mr. McMahon says the WWE Universe is going to have fun tonight, then passes the mic to Brad Maddox who apologizes for letting John Cena choose his opponent at Summerslam. Mr. McMahon reminds Brad Maddox about him calling Daniel Bryan an undersized troll with psychological problems who doesn’t have the aura to be WWE Champion.

Mr. McMahon asks Brad Maddox how he really feels about Daniel Bryan, but Bryan interrupts.

Daniel Bryan takes the mic as Mr. McMahon tries to silent the Daniel Bryan chants. Bryan says with all due respect, those words came out of the mouth of Brad Maddox, but he believes they were dictated by Mr. McMahon. Mr. McMahon calls Daniel Bryan out on having a lack of disrespect for interrupting him, but Bryan tells Mr. McMahon respect is a two way street. Bryan talks about giving everything he had, night after night for the WWE for years, but thinks Mr. McMahon doesn’t give him an ounce of respect.

Mr. McMahon asks Daniel Bryan if he respects John Cena, then asks the WWE Universe to behave themselves since they’re chanting “YES!” Daniel Bryan says he respects John Cena as a human being, a Champion and that he picked him as his opponent at Summerslam.

Mr. McMahon asks Bryan if he would respect Cena if he was lying about all the things he said about Daniel Bryan. McMahon claims John Cena is lying through his teeth and that Cena is a master manipulator who is making Daniel Bryan look foolish.

Mr. McMahon asks Daniel Bryan and the WWE Universe if they’re fools, then tells Bryan that Cena also knows that Daniel Bryan can’t beat him. Mr. McMahon thinks that Daniel Bryan can’t even beat Kane because Bryan doesn’t have that intangible quality or Ruthless Aggression. Mr. McMahon tells Daniel Bryan that John Cena also lost his Ruthless Aggression, and that he’s ripe for the picking, but doesn’t think Daniel Bryan can beat Cena at Summerslam.

Mr. McMahon says even though he doesn’t want Daniel Bryan to win, he doesn’t want John Cena to win either. McMahon claims Cena walks around like he’s better than him and that he owns the place. McMahon says he doesn’t want a half-pint troll like Daniel Bryan, who is an embarrassment to the company, to win either. Mr. McMahon says that the person he wants to win at Summerslam is himself. McMahon bends down to get on “Daniel Bryan’s level,” then tells his theory of what he wants to happen at Summerslam. He wants Daniel Bryan and John Cena to lock up then spontaneously combust.

Daniel Bryan says that if John Cena is lying, he will have hell to pay. Bryan is about to tells Mr. McMahon what he likes about him, but decides to get on “McMahon’s Level” by standing on his tip-toes. Mr. McMahon tries to stand on his tip-toes as well, but quickly gives up.

Daniel Bryan tells Mr. McMahon that McMahon is always honest with him and what he really thinks, but it doesn’t matter what Mr. McMahon thinks. It matters what the WWE Universe thinks. After the “YES!” chants, Bryan says it sounds like the WWE Universe wants a new WWE Champion and his name is Daniel Bryan. Bryan tells McMahon to listen to the WWE Universe, then asks if they want a new WWE Champion. Loud “YES!” chants are heard as Daniel Bryan joins in with the WWE Universe. Mr. McMahon looks dumbfounded.

Match 01: The Shield vs. Mark Henry and The Usos

Mark Henry and Roman Reigns go Face-To-Face.

Winners: The Shield

Post-Match, Mark Henry takes out The Shield.

Backstage: WWE Employees are in catering having a case of the Mondays.

Ryback joins them in catering, then calls one of the employees out on having a problem. The employee says he doesn’t have a problem, but Ryback pushes him into a wall. Ryback asks if the employee has something to say to him and if he’s scared, but he doesn’t answer.

Ryback asks the employee if he’s hungry, then slaps him with a piece of tuna!

Ryback grabs the employee then says he’s going to put John Cena through a table like this tonight then says he could put the employee through a table right now if he wanted. A few seconds later, Ryback slams the employee through the table!

Backstage: Kane walks up to Brad Maddox and asks where the Wyatts are. Maddox says they’re not here, but if he wants to send a message that he’s a monster and has that killer instinct, he should do it against his former tag team partner and good friend, Daniel Bryan.

Match 02: Rob Van Dam vs. Fandango

Fandango walks out of the match.

Winner: Rob Van Dam (Via countout)

Post-Match, Fandango takes the mic and says his catchphrase.

Backstage: AJ Lee complains to Big E. Langston about having to face Kaitlyn again and how she doesn’t want to get speared. AJ starts yelling at Big E. Langston for allowing Kaitlyn to spear her.

Big E. Langston is about to speak, but AJ Lee starts laughing hysterically. AJ tells Big E. that she knows the reason Big E. stands there and watches is because he likes her and what she does in the ring. AJ tells Big E. that he never knows what she’s going to do next then skips off.

Match 03: Kaitlyn vs. AJ Lee

Kaitlyn hits AJ Lee with the spear!

Winner: Kaitlyn

Post-Match, AJ snaps and starts throwing a tantrum in the ring.

Dolph Ziggler’s theme plays and Ziggler comes out.

Dolph Ziggler congratulates AJ Lee on her loss, then says her new friend, Big E., can be her shoulder to cry on tonight. After that, AJ can do Big E. a favor and be a shoulder for him to cry on, because Dolph wants a match with Big E. Langston right now!

Match 04: Dolph Ziggler vs. Big E. Langston

Big E. Langston keeps screaming that it’s his time while he beats up Dolph Ziggler.

AJ Lee gets in the ring then attacks Dolph Ziggler. AJ starts pulling at his hair.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

Post-Match, Big E. Langston yells at a screaming AJ Lee, who’s for interfering in the match. Dolph Ziggler sneaks up then takes Langston down with a Zig Zag.

Backstage: John Cena is on the phone when Daniel Bryan interrupts him. Bryan asks John Cena if it’s true what Mr. McMahon said out there. Cena says that he wouldn’t believe a word Daniel Bryan said out there. Bryan says that good or bad, Mr. McMahon has always been honest with him. Cena asks Daniel Bryan if he’s calling him a liar, but Bryan doesn’t respond. Cena walks off as Bryan stares at him.

Match 05: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Christian goes for the Killswitch, but his arm gives out. Alberto Del Rio goes for the Cross Arm Breaker, but Christian counters with a roll up!

Winner: Christian

Recaps on Caps on Caps: Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes and The Gulf Of Mexico

Match 06: Wade Barrett vs. Cody Rhodes

Wade Barrett goes for a Pumphande Slam, but Cody Rhodes counters with Cross Rhodes!

Winner: Cody Rhodes

Post-Match, Damien Sandow damns Cody Rhodes for throwing his Money In The Bank Briefcase in the Gulf Of Mexico, then tells Cody that he filed a complaint against him with WWE Management. Sandow says he tried to bring Cody up to his level of success, but all Cody Rhodes did was grow a mustache. Sandow tells Cody that it’s not his fault since he comes from a family a clowns instead of a family of scholars like Sandow.

Cody challenges Damien Sandow to get into the ring, but Sandow declines claiming “Carny Folk” are beneath his constitution.

Match 07: Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Kane goes for a small package, but Daniel Bryan counters with a roll up

Winner: Daniel Bryan

Post-Match, Kane chokeslams Daniel Bryan.

Kane goes for his fire trick, but The Wyatt Family’s music plays.

Kane tries to attack Bray Wyatt first, but gets attacked by The Wyatt Family

The Wyatt Family takes out Kane, then Bray Wyatt hits Kane with his finisher.

Bray Wyatt tells Kane that he likes to call himself the Devil’s Favorite Demon, but Kane is no demon. Wyatt grabs Kane’s head and says that he needs to let him in on a little secret: He needs to be careful who he says these things around because you never know who might be listening. Wyatt drops Kane’s head then laughs before screaming “Follow The Buzzards!”

Backstage: The Bellas are talking to each other when they’re interrupted by Natalya who tells them they have a match tonight.

Brie Bella tells Natalya that she’s going to be a losing tonight, but that they’re all winners in Total Divas. Nikki says that in every good story there’s always an ugly duckling.

Match 08: Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Natalya almost puts Brie Bella in the Sharpshooter, but Nikki Bella comes out and distracts Natalya with a duck whistle.

Brie Bella takes advantage and rolls up Natalya.

Winner: Natalya

Post-Match, The Bellas continue to mock Natalya with the duck whistle.

Match 09: R-Truth vs. Curtis Axel

Paul Heyman says that he finds it ironic that his client is known as R-Truth, because Heyman’s truth is that he’s the greatest manager, agent and advocate in sports entertainment in history. Heyman starts hyping up Brock Lesnar, then claims Lesnar will end the career of Heyman’s former best friend, CM Punk at Summerslam. Heyman switches his gears to Curtis Axel and says that being a Paul Heyman Guy means that you’re among the elite circle of top, tier talent in history. A fact perfectly personified by Curtis Axel.

Curtis Axel takes the mic and says that his father, Mr. Perfect, won the Intercontinental Title in Texas. But despite that, he went on to become Mr. Perfect. As for Axel, he claims that he’s more perfect than perfect.

CM Punk runs out and attacks Curtis Axel.

CM Punk goes for Paul Heyman and almost gets him.

Curtis Axel tries to stop CM Punk, but Punk takes him out while Paul Heyman runs away.

Winner: Curtis Axel (via DQ)

Backstage: Triple H asks Mr. McMahon if he’s done “jerking Daniel Bryan around” and McMahon responds that he’s using reverse psychology on Daniel Bryan and maybe he actually wants Daniel Bryan to be WWE Champion. Triple H calls McMahon out on not being able to say that with a straight face then says he thinks Bryan can beat Cena. Mr. McMahon says he doesn’t want Bryan to beat Cena. He wants someone like Triple H to beat John Cena…only 23 years younger.

Stephanie McMahon interrupts with an idea. Stephanie thinks Daniel Bryan needs a little bit of help and thinks they should give Daniel Bryan a Corporate Makeover. Mr. McMahon tells her Good Luck with That then walks off. Triple H says it’s worth a shot..

Match 10: John Cena vs. Ryback (Tables Match)

Ryback breaks the TABLE…by breaking it on the ringpost.

John Cena pulls out a table then tries to throw the table ON TOP of Ryback, but Ryback hides underneath the ring.

John Cena and Ryback each pick up Steel Steps.

John Cena and Ryback throw the Steel Steps at each other.

John Cena throws Ryback through the table with an AA.

Winner: John Cena

Post-Match, Daniel Bryan comes out doing the “YES!” Chant. Bryan grabs the WWE Title then gets in the ring with it.

Daniel Bryan almost hands the title to John Cena, but Bryan pulls it away.

John Cena snatches the title back from Daniel Bryan. Bryan starts doing the “YES!” Chant.

So That Happened:

This entry was posted in STH, WWE, WWE RAW and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s