So That Happened: 06/24/13

RAW starts off with Daniel Bryan!

Daniel Bryan takes the mic and says before he starts the match, there are some people that accuse him of having a “complex.” Bryan says that people think he’s a walking example of the Little Man Syndrome then imitates people mocking him about his size. Bryan says he’s going to set the record straight: He was not an extra in the hobbit.


Daniel Bryan says that whether it was teaming with Kane or back on NXT, someone has always called him the weak link. Bryan calls those people morons and mentions that he stood toe-to-toe with Randy Orton twice and that a true weak link would have taken the countout victory, but he won’t be satisfied until he pins Randy Orton or makes Orton tap out. Bryan asks the WWE Universe if he’s going to do that tonight and does a “YES” chant until Randy Orton comes out.

Daniel Bryan thanks Randy Orton for coming down to the ring, but Orton grabs the mic.

Randy Orton says he wanted to tell Daniel Bryan straight to his face, “Shut up and fight!” Bryan immediately starts attacking Orton.

Match 01: Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton

Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton continue to brawl until the referee gets knocked down.

Winner: No Contest 

Post-Match, Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton continue to brawl.

Backstage: Daniel Bryan storms in on Vickie Guerrero and Brad Maddox and demands a match with Randy Orton. Brad Maddox tries to talk him out of it saying they have a full show. Bryan says if he can’t have a match with Orton, he wants a match with Maddox.

Vickie Guerrero grants Daniel Bryan his match with Orton who screams “YES!” before walking out.

Vickie Guerrero teases Brad Maddox about being scared to face Daniel Bryan until Mr. McMahon shows up. Mr. McMahon tells Vickie Guerrero that some people consider Daniel Bryan an embarrassment because of his size and psychological complexity. Vickie Guerrero asks Mr. McMahon what he thinks, and McMahon tells her to figure it out then walks off.

Match 02: Team Rhodes Scholars vs. #ScumbagSheamus and Christian

Cody Rhodes pushes Damien Sandow out of the way and gets a Brogue Kick. Winners: Christian and #ScumbagSheamus

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero walks up to CM Punk who is texting. Vickie calls Punk’s name and he asks if Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar are here, but Vickie says she hasn’t seen them. Vickie Guerrero tries to put Punk in a match tonight, but Punk continues texting.

Vickie screams “Excuse Me!” but Punk responds with an “Excuse Me” of his own then tells Vickie to find him when Heyman and Lesnar show up.

Match 03: Kaitlyn vs. Aksana

During the match, Kaitlyn’s theme plays and she starts to get confused.

AJ Lee comes out dressed Kaitlyn during the match.

Aksana tries to roll up Kaitlyn, but she kicks out. Aksana gets a spear for her efforts.

Winner: Kaitlyn

Post-Match, AJ Lee continues her Kaitlyn roleplay by mocking Kaitlyn for losing the Divas Championship to AJ and her dignity. AJ makes fun of Kaitlyn for actually believing she had a secret admirer and then Big E. Langston comes out.

AJ Lee and Big E. Langston do a dramatic reenactment of Kaitlyn finding out Big E. Langston was the secret admirer, adding comments like “I always wished to find a man who had a voice as deep as mine, legs as thick as mine and an Adam’s apple.”

AJ, still impersonating Kaitlyn, says that she knows she’ll never beat AJ for the Divas Championship, so she’s going to continue being the butt of AJ’s jokes. Kaitlyn tries to attack AJ, but Layla holds her back as AJ leaves in Big E.’s arms.

Match 04: Chris Jericho vs. Alberto Del Rio

RicRod mocks South Caroline then introduces Alberto Del Rio.

Chris Jericho hits the Lionsault.

Alberto Del Rio locks Chris Jericho in the Cross Armbreaker!

Chris Jericho counters it with the Walls Of Jericho, but RicRod quickly interferes and attacks Y2J with the bucket!

Winner: Chris Jericho (via DQ)

Post-Match, Dolph Ziggler comes in and attacks Alberto Del Rio.

RicRod tries to interfere but Chris Jericho takes him down with a Codebreaker! Dolph Ziggler and Chris Jericho have a staredown.

Chris Jericho walks off, but Dolph Ziggler hits the Zig Zag on Y2J.

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero is talking with Brad Maddox about cancelling Daniel Bryan’s match tonight until Triple H walks in and says that he heard a nasty rumor about Vickie cancelling the match. Vickie explains herself, but Triple H tells her it doesn’t matter what he or anyone else back here thinks, it’s about what the WWE Universe wants. Vickie agrees and Triple H tells her that he wants her to over deliver tonight. Triple H wants the WWE Universe to pick the stipulation between Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton. Vickie reluctantly agrees.

WWE 2K14 Cover Reveal: Jerry Lawler introduces Vickie Guerrero and Brad Maddox then says they’re out here to debut the launch of the new WWE2K14 Videogame. Lawler tells the WWE Universe about a contest where a fan can create their own cover of the videogame. The winner will have the honor of having their cover on the flipside of the videogame.

Vickie Guerrero interrupts Jerry Lawler and starts getting booed immediately. Vickie screams Excuse Me, but it only makes things worse. Vickie tells the WWE Universe that having your voice heard is important, whether it’s a videogame cover or a match. Vickie Guerrero tries to tell the WWE Universe that she’s giving them a chance to choose the stipulation for Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton but they keep booing. The stipulations are: Lumberjack Match, Street Fight or Falls Count Anywhere.

Vickie Guerrero decides to reveal her own cover of WWE 2K14 which features Mr. McMahon, Triple H and Stephanie McMahon.

Brad Maddox reveals his own cover of WWE 2K14, which represents (in his eyes), the future of the WWE. It’s John Cena, CM Punk and Brad Maddox in the center.

Vickie Guerrero and Brad Maddox start arguing, but Jerry Lawler cuts them off and gets ready to reveal the REAL cover of WWE 2K14! It’s The Rock!

Match 05: Ryback vs. The Great Khali

Ryback manages to lift The Great Khali up for Shellshock then drops him with it!

Winner: Ryback

John Cena Speaks:

John Cena talks about how lively the crowd is tonight and how the WWE Universe Members know the WWE. Cena shifts focus over to the WWE Championship and mentions that thousands have tried to win it, but only 43 men have been able to win the WWE Championship. Cena says whether you’ve held the title for 8 years like Bruno Sammartino or one night, like Rey Mysterio, winning the WWE Championship puts you in an elite fraternity because you’ve earned the respect of your peers.

Flashback to that glorious day: 
Image courtesy of The Art Of Wrasslin

John Cena says many men have tried to do some crazy and dastardly things to hold on to the WWE Championship but shortcuts do not equal respect. Cena talks about how men have tried to buy and steal the WWE Championship and how he’s seen men crack under pressure on their quest to chase the title. Cena reminds us that Mr. McMahon was also a WWE Champion then says last week, we saw how low a man would go to chase the WWE Championship.

John Cena reminds us all of what Mark Henry did, claiming that he disgraced his family and cheated the WWE Universe. Cena thinks that Henry’s speech was an utter disaster and disrespectful to Superstars like Edge, Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels who actually had retirement speeches. Cena assumes Mark Henry did what he did because he’s been in the WWE for 17 years and realizes that his time is running out and will not have a legacy unless he holds on to the WWE Championship.

John Cena tells Mark Henry that to hold on to the WWE Championship, Henry has to go through him, and that the best part of Mark Henry’s speech was when he handed back the WWE Championship and said he had to earn it. Cena agrees then tells Henry that he’ll realize at Money In The Bank, the only thing Henry earned was the opportunity to knock Henry’s teeth down his throat. Cena talks about how dangerous and deceitful Mark Henry is, but mentions there’s one thing Henry forgot to do: Check his calendar. Cena says they’re still in the middle of Whoop Ass Season and in 3 weeks, Mark Henry is going to find out what the world already knows: RTIME=NOW and The Champ Is Here!

Match 06: Tons Of Funk vs. 3MB vs. The Usos (#1 Contenders Match)

Scotty Campbell, who bid for this during the Superstars For Sandy Relief, comes out dancing with Tons Of Funk.

Winners: The Usos

Post-Match, The Shield comes out and has a staredown with The Usos.

Paul Heyman Speaks: Paul Heyman says for the past week, he’s been asked about Brock Lesnar attacking CM Punk on RAW and he’s been avoiding talking to CM Punk’s calls, texts and voicemails because he wants to do this face-to-face. Heyman calls out CM Punk, who comes down to the ring.

CM Punk questions Paul Heyman for wanting to air Dirty Laundry in public then says that before he asks his questions, the public needs to be caught up to speed on why he even has questions. CM Punk goes through the long history of why he is a Paul Heyman Guy (I’m not typing it out. Watch the segment or Buy the DVD. It’s worth it.)

CM Punk finishes the history lesson then tells Paul Heyman that there’s two things he wants to say to him. The first thing is he wants Heyman to tell Brock Lesnar that he’s coming for him. Punk doesn’t care if Brock is bigger or stronger because Brock is not better than him. Punk says he’s the best wrestler on the planet and that Paul Heyman knows it better than anybody. Punk tells Heyman that he’s going to say this to his face since Brock doesn’t have the balls to be here: There’s no one more sadistic, relentless or dangerous than CM Punk and Punk will do whatever he has to in order to bring Heyman’s Beast Incarnate down.

CM Punk tells Paul Heyman that despite Heyman’s past, he never did Punk wrong. Punk asks Heyman if Brock Lesnar attacked him on his own or if Heyman sent Brock Lesnar to attack him because Punk told him he didn’t want Heyman ringside anymore. An emotional Punk implores Heyman to tell the truth, and swear on his children if he had something to do with this.

Paul Heyman tells CM Punk that he never wanted it to be this way between them, but since he demands the truth and because Punk’s his best friend, he deserves the truth. Heyman claims on his children, he did not know that Brock Lesnar would be here last week. After the crowd boos, Heyman says that’s the same response he would get from Mr. McMahon, Stephanie McMahon and John Laurinaitis whenever he mentioned CM Punk.

Paul Heyman reminds CM Punk that Brock Lesnar fulfilled his contractual obligations and that he had no idea Brock Lesnar would be there last week. Heyman also reminds Punk that the moment Heyman said Brock Lesnar needed his help, CM Punk picked a fight with Brock Lesnar. Heyman says this was bound to happen because of their professional jealousy with each other. Heyman backs that up by saying that’s the reason he never pitched a CM Punk/Brock Lesnar tag team to Punk, Brock or Mr. McMahon.

Paul Heyman says Friendship was the exception to the rule with Brock Lesnar and CM Punk, just like it was in 2005/2006 when he was trying to bring CM Punk up. Heyman agrees about all his flaws, but says he’s not stupid. Heyman thinks he’s going to walk down that aisle one day with CM Punk when he’s challenging for the WWE Championship or in the Main Event at Wrestlemania. Heyman says that’s his dream because of as unpopular and uncomfortable as it is for people to here, he loves CM Punk and Punk is his best friend.

Paul Heyman tells Punk that he will never represent anyone against him and that includes Brock Lesnar. Heyman says Brock Lesnar will have a problem with that, but that’s not Punk’s problem. That’s Heyman’s problem. Paul Heyman reminds CM Punk that in 2005/2006 that everyone wanted him to get rid of CM Punk. Heyman brings it to 2013 and says everyone is now telling Punk to get rid of Heyman. Heyman tells Punk that his fate is in Punk’s hands and with all due respect, it’s Punk’s move.

After thinking about it for quite some time, CM Punk tells Paul Heyman that he’s sorry that he doubted Heyman then gives him a hug.

I’m sorry…

Match 07: Darren Young vs. CM Punk

Darren Young is actually take it to CM Punk!

Darren Young hits the Gutbuster on CM Punk and gets a 2.9 count!

CM Punk manages to lock in the Anaconda Vice.

Winner: CM Punk

Post-Match, CM Punk gets attacked by The Prime Time Players until Curtis Axel comes out for the save.

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero is asking for Brad Maddox to return until she’s interrupted by Stephanie McMahon. Stephanie McMahon asks Vickie why she hasn’t mentioned the Championship Participants in the Money In The Bank Yet. Vickie says she’s been swamped but Stephanie decides to announce the participants herself.

Stephanie McMahon announces the RAW Money In The Bank Participants:

Stephanie McMahon lists the MITB Ladder Match Partcipants: CM Punk! Daniel Bryan! Sheamus!

Randy Orton, Christian, Kane….

And making his return to the WWE for the first time in 4 years…*Stephanie does a RVD Impression* Rob Van Dam!

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero and Brad Maddox argue until Ryback walks up breathing heavily. Ryback brags about how easily he defeated The Great Khali and how he pinned John Cena at Payback. Ryback demands that Vickie Guerrero cancel the John Cena and Mark Henry match and make a rematch between Ryback and John Cena for the WWE Championship. Ryback continues to complain until he’s interrupted by Chris Jericho, who vents his frustrations about being attacked by 3 guys tonight and not being in the Money In The Bank. Jericho thinks he deserves to be in the match so he can become WWE Champion. Ryback gets mad at Chris Jericho for interrupting him then claims he can eat Jericho alive.

Brad Maddox tries to separates Chris Jericho and Ryback, but gets scared off when they stare at him. Vickie Guerrero screams Excuse Me then yells at the two of them for making demands when she is their boss. Vickie decides to have Ryback face Chris Jericho at Money In The Bank then kicks them out her office. Ryback tells Jericho that he’ll see him at MITB.

Backstage: CM Punk is upset at Paul Heyman for getting involved in his match with the Prime Time Players. Heyman says that the PTP jumped CM Punk and he didn’t want to see his best friend jumped. Heyman tells Punk he fixed it by making the Prime Time Players vs. CM Punk and Curtis Axel. An angry Punk accepts the match because it’s his fight and he’s going to prove that he’s the Best In the World.

Mark Henry Speaks:

Mark Henry brags that he fooled everyone then mocks the WWE Universe for their signs, chants and tears. Henry claims because of his spectacular performance, he’s been nominated for an Academy Award. Henry also claims he had Quentin Tarantino, Steven Spielberg and Tyler Perry reach out to him, which is great, but not what he wants or deserves.

Mark Henry says he’s had people very upset with him because he used his friends, family and WWE Superstars, but he’s not going to apologize to anyone. Henry talks about how people his whole life have been telling him how to live and to work hard. Henry says at Money In The Bank, you’re going to see a no good, dirty, filthy, lying, cheating, Mark Henry then calls the WWE Universe puppets. Henry says last week, he said that he was coming home. Henry tries to continue, but a fan calls him out on his suit and Henry quickly shuts him down and says he’s coming home WWE Champion.

Match 08: Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton (Street Fight)

Daniel Bryan tries to kick Randy Orton onto the table, but decides to slide out of the ring and Powerbomb Orton through the table!

Daniel Bryan hits Randy Orton with his kicks to the chest, while adding hits with a kendo stick!

Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton start punching each other.

After multiple attempts to lock in the No Lock on Randy Orton, Daniel Bryan locks in the No Lock while stabbing Orton with the Kendo Stick! Orton has no choice but to tap out.

Winner: Daniel Bryan

Post-Match, Randy Orton reluctantly shakes Daniel Bryan’s hand then leaves the ring. Daniel Bryan celebrates with “YES!” chants.

So That Happened:

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