So That Happened: 02/18/13

RAW begins with John Cena making his entrance.

John Cena hypes Lafayette, LA then Wrestlemania 29’s two World Championship Matches: Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio and John Cena vs. The Rock. CM Punk’s music plays and comes down to ringside.

CM Punk tells John Cena that facing The Rock at Wrestlemania is the easy the way out, but he expects nothing less from Cena. Punk admits he lost fair and square, despite having The Rock pinned in the middle of the ring and despite Rock striking a WWE official.

CM Punk brings up that The Rock has beaten John Cena, but Cena has never beaten Punk. Cena says he’s not talking about wins/losses, he’s talking about Wrestlemania. Cena reminds Punk that he earned the right to go to Wrestlemania and tells Punk to sit this one out because it’s not about him.

CM Punk says it is about CM Punk because he earned his right to go to Wrestlemania since he was WWE Champion for 434 Days. John Cena just threw people over the rope in the Royal Rumble and got lucky. CM Punk says that Rock/Cena is a rerun and that Cena can’t get it done or win the big one. John Cena asks CM Punk what he wants him to do. CM Punk tells John Cena he wants him to just walk away and get out of Punk’s life.

John Cena pretends he’s gonna walk away then says “No.” Cena says he admires Punk’s honesty and thinks that there’s a halfway decent human being in CM Punk, but Cena isn’t giving away his golden ticket to Wrestlemania. Cena says despite CM Punk’s attitude, he’s right about Cena being unable to beat The Rock or Punk and knows he has critics that believe he shouldn’t be in the main event of Wrestlemania.

John Cena says he won’t give away his Wrestlemania Title Shot, but he’ll let CM Punk earn it. Cena challenges CM Punk to a match. If Cena wins, CM Punk shuts up and goes away. But if he loses, CM Punk goes to Wrestlemania.

CM Punk talks to Paul Heyman then agrees to the match, but refuses to do it tonight since he was screwed in Louisiana. Punk says he’ll do the match on his terms next week. CM Punk walks away, but John Cena tells him to run away and get rest because next week, Cena will beat Punk, then go on to beat The Rock and prove that The Champ Is Here.

Backstage: Matt Striker asks Sheamus about The Shield, but Ryback’s frantic pacing around distracts him. Sheamus tells Ryback that they both lost the match, but have to adapt and overcome. Sheamus reminds Ryback that he’s not a machine and not a mindless Neanderthal. Sheamus and Ryback and fight until Chris Jericho breaks them up by slapping theirs chests several times.

Chris Jericho talks some sense into Sheamus and Ryback about The Shield and says that they have to do what it takes to save the WWE from The Shield. Jericho offers to team with Sheaback tonight in an attempt to stop The Shield. Ryback looks in Sheamus’ face and says “FEED. ME. SHIELD.”

Match 01: Mark Henry vs. Sin Cara

Winner: Mark Henry

Post-Match, Mark Henry tries to hit the World’s Strongest Slam on Sin Cara but The Great Khali walks out.

Mark Henry leaves as The Great Khali finally makes it to the ring. Mark Henry mocks Khali’s dancing.

Fandangoo Promo:

Match 02: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro (No Disqualification)

Antonio Cesaro brings out the weapons!

The Miz gets the upperhand then locks in the Figure-Four on Cesaro!


Winner: The Miz

Zeb Colter and Jack Swagger speak on Immigration: Long story short, they don’t like Mexicans.

Backstage: Daniel Bryan tells Kane that he’s not comfortable with teaming up with Kane so he requested a singles match with Jack Swagger tonight. Bryan doesn’t want Kane coming out with him. Kane says he’ll request a singles match of his own and he doesn’t want Bryan coming out either. Bryan agrees but Kane tells him he’d better be a man of his word because he doesn’t deal well with snakes. Randy Orton pops up saying “Someone talkin’ about me?”

Kane talks about how much he hates snakes, but Randy Orton says he’s no longer intimidated by Kane since he’s traded in his Chokeslams and Piledrivers for group therapy and hugs. Orton compares Kane to Barney The Dinosaur then walks off as Bryan laughs and Kane gets upset.

Courtesy of Facebook

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero is on the phone until she gets interrupted by Paul Heyman. Vickie mocks Paul Heyman’s stipulations for the Rock/Punk match, then tells him that she has dramatic news that’s going to affect his life and his entire career. Heyman wants to know now since he hates surprises but Vickie refuses to tell him.

Match 03: Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio

Jack Swagger and Zeb Colter are seen watching Alberto Del Rio’s match:

Alberto Del Rio locks in Dolph Ziggler the Cross Armbreaker.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

Post-Match, Big E. Langston attacks Alberto Del Rio!

Dolph Ziggler realizes that it’s a good time to cash in!

RicRod grabs the briefcase!

RicRod runs as Big E Langston chases him.

AJ Lee gets the briefcase, but Alberto Del Rio hits Dolph Ziggler with an enzuigiri.

Wade Barrett debuts the trailer for his new movie: Deadman Down

Sheamus interrupts Wade Barrett’s moment on the Titantron. and mocks him for not being the star of Deadman Down. Sheamus says Colin Farrell is the star of the movie, but if Wade has any objections they can talk about it. Sheamus tells Barrett that they’re out of time then leaves.

Match 04: Brodus Clay, Tensai and Naomi vs. Primo, Epico and Rosa Mendes

Primo and Epico’s music cuts off Brodus Clay’s music.

Naomi is star of the match!

Winner: Brodus Clay, Tensai and Naomi 

Post-Match, Brodus Clay and Tensai dance while Michael Cole dubs Brodus Clay and Tensai as “The Dancing Bears.”

Wrestlemania 30 Announcement:

Jack Swagger’s State Of Union Address: 

Jack Swagger talks about his success from last night then says tonight is about something bigger: Our Country. Swagger introduces himself then Zeb Colter.

Zeb Colter thanks out Founding Fathers for creating the Bill Of Rights then talks about the right of free speech. Colter says the State of the Union is pathetic, but real Americans are not to blame. The people who are to blame are the millions of millions of illegal immigrants.

Zeb Colter says Real Americans need to stand up and defend the country, but that’s what Jack Swagger will do. Zeb Colter says that the World Heavyweight Title match is more than a match, but it’s a battle for this country. Colter claims Alberto Del Rio came into this country to reap the rewards of the motherland. Colter claims Jack Swagger will accomplish two goals at Wrestlemania: Reclaim the World Heavyweight Championship and Reclaim America. Jack Swagger starts screaming “WE THE PEOPLE!

Match 05: Daniel Bryan vs. Jack Swagger

Winner: Jack Swagger

Vickie Guerrero’s surprise for Paul Heyman: 

Vickie Guerrero says she has an announcement for Paul Heyman that can drastically change his career and his life. Vickie names a new assistant for herself: Brad “Heartthrob Ref” Maddox!

Brad “Heartthrob Assistant” Maddox says he got this job due to his loyalty and him exposing the The Shield and Paul Heyman. HTA says McMahon gave him the role of “Assistant Managing Supervisor” but Vickie Guerrero corrects him saying he’s the “Assistant TO the General Manager.” Pau Heyman is unimpressed with the surprise and is prepared to leave but Mr. McMahon appears on the Titantron.

Mr. McMahon reminds Paul Heyman about the deal he made to get the CM Punk/Rock stipulation, showing that Heyman said he would do “Anything.” McMahon says he could fire Paul Heyman right now, but rather than do that, he’s going to fight Paul Heyman.

Match 06: Chris Jericho, Sheamus and Ryback vs. The Shield

A fan tries to get in the moment:

Chris Jericho has Dean Ambrose locked in the Walls Of Jericho, until Seth Rollins comes from out of nowhere!


Winner: The Shield

Match 07: Damien Sandow vs. Kofi Kingston

Damien Sandow lectures the WWE Universe about President’s Day then says that several members of the Sandow Family served as personal advisors to the President in history. Sandow trashes the fans some more then cheapshots Kofi Kingston and starts pummeling him.

R-Truth makes his “triumphant” return saving Kofi Kingston from the attack…

Winner: No Contest 
Loser: Everyone who can’t stand R-Truth 

Match 08: Randy Orton vs. Kane

Daniel Bryan comes down to the ring and distracts Kane. Randy Orton takes advantage and hits the RKO.

Winner: Randy Orton

The Rock’s Championship Celebration Ceremony:

The Rock comes out with a special Marching Band entrance.

The Rock says last night CM Punk did everything to beat The Rock but the Best In The World wasn’t best enough because The Rock beat him. Rock starts describing his day in Louisiana naming familiar places until he gets to his “FINALLY” bit.

The Rock says he’s going to Wrestlemania in 48 days but he’s not going with the spinner belt. The Rock puts over the Spinner Belt, then mocks it. The Rock says that the WWE Title should never look like a toy and it should never, EVER spin. The Rock does something drastic with the “Spinner Title”

But seriously, The Rock gives the old Spinner Belt to Scotty The Segment Producer and tells him to make sure that belt goes into the Hall Of Fame.

The Rock talks about the WWE Title and says it should inspire you and should be worthy to be worn around the waist of the great men of WWE Champions of the past. The Rock mentions Bruno Sammartino, Hulk Hogan, Bret Hart, and Stone Cold Steve Austin then unveils the NEW WWE Championship!

Courtesy of WWE.com

The Rock asks the WWE Universe if they love the title. The Rock says he wanted to make a title that was prestigious and bad ass. The crowd chants “Who Dat” and “Boots To Asses.” The Rock says there are some “Crazy Cajuns in the crowd”

The Rock is about to announce who he’d rather face between John Cena and CM Punk until John Cena’s music plays. Cena comes out and stares down The Rock until CM Punk knocks Cena out with the old WWE Championship. Punk chucks the old WWE Championship then says he wants the new belt.

So That Happened:

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