So That Happened: 02/11/13

RAW starts off with Paul Heyman in the ring saying tonight is the last night we’re going to see Paul Heyman. Heyman says he won’t play the victim and that everything he’s done he’s done with great passion, but those passions keep betraying. Heyman says he sacrificed years of his life to bring ECW, Brock Lesnar and CM Punk to wrestling fans.

Paul Heyman says he can see into the future and he thinks something really bad is going to happen. Heyman believes this will affect him and everyone around him, including CM Punk. and Heyman says CM Punk needs to be focused and believes Punk will one day be WWE Champion again. Heyman doesn’t want to be a distraction to CM Punk, which is why tonight he’s tendering his resignation.

Paul Heyman trashes the fans for their lack of compassion and says the one thing he won’t miss is the WWE Universe. Heyman says that he loves CM Punk and refuses to stand in his way. Heyman gives goodbyes one more time until he’s interrupted by CM Punk

CM Punk asks Paul Heyman what he’s doing and Heyman reminds him about Vince McMahon’s vendettas against them. Punk refuses to let Heyman resign. Punk says that just like him, the WWE Universe looks up to Paul Heyman, just like him and reminds Heyman of all the “Paul Heyman Guys” out there. Heyman reminds Punk that Vince McMahon is out to screw them and Punk to remember Heyman not as a Martyr, but as a Friend.

CM Punk convinces Paul Heyman to stay on board then the two embrace in a bro hug. Paul Heyman keeps calling CM Punk “The Best In The World” while CM Punk stares sadistically.

Match 01: Mark Henry vs. The Great Khali

Winner: Mark Henry

Post-match. Mark Henry sets his targets on Hornswoggle!

Mark Henry takes Hornswoggle out with the World’s Strongest Slam!

Courtesy of doomsday519

As bad as things look, Overly Optimistic Natalya remains true to herself:

Backstage: Booker T and Mark Henry talk about how impressive Mark Henry is. Chris Jericho walks up and pleads his case to be in the Elimination Chamber for Smackdown. Teddy Long wants him in, but Booker T wants Jericho to impress him first. Teddy Long gives Booker T an idea but Booker T hates it.

Booker T gives Chris Jericho a match with Daniel Bryan!! Chris Jericho shows his gratitude for his match with “Daniel Bearden” by imitating Booker T and saying he’ll be 7 Time World Champion.

Backstage: Vickie Guerrero and Paul Heyman are talking. Heyman tries to get Vickie to add a stipulation to the WWE Title match, but Vickie refuses. Mr. McMahon calls Vickie Guerrero and Vickie puts him on speaker phone. McMahon hears out Heyman’s stipulation, which is if Rock gets counted out or DQ’d, the title goes back to CM Punk. McMahon accepts Heyman’s proposal, then hangs up on him.

Fandangoo Promo:

Match 02: Chris Jericho vs. Daniel Bryan

Chris Jericho locks the Walls Of Jericho on Daniel Bryan

Chris Jericho and Daniel Bryan remind us why we’re all watching tonight.

Chris Jericho hits the Codebreaker!

Winner: Chris Jericho

Match 03: Three Man Band vs. John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus

Winner: John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus

Post-Match, Ryback says this Sunday at Elimination Chamber is the day he will feast on The Shield. Sheamus says all we’ve heard is “Believe In The Shield” but even though he’s facing them on Sunday, he believes that they should get justice tonight. John Cena takes the mic and gets booed. Cena says this Sunday, The Shield will meet the sword, and Justice Is The Law.

Backstage: Alex Riley and Yoshi Tatsu are making fun of Big Show. Big Show just knocks them out.

Matt Striker is in the ring. Big Show comes down to the ring. Striker tries to ask Big Show a question, but Big Show knocks him out. Big Show takes the mic and tries to speak but he’s too angry.

Big Show walks away without saying a word.

Match 04: Jack Swagger vs. Zack Ryder

Jack Swagger walks out with a mysterious, mustacheod man

Jack Swagger destroys Zack Ryder!

Winner: Jack Swagger

Post-Match, Jack Swagger introduces Zeb Colter, a great native, friend and REAL American. Zeb Colter asks what is wrong with America, then says most Americans don’t know what’s wrong with America. Colter says that he and Jack Swagger are real Patriots and Americans.

Zeb Colter says that now he sees people’s faces that don’t look like his and wonders where they all came from and wants to get rid of them. Zeb Colter says he and Jack Swagger know the truth: America’s the land of the free and the home of the brave, not to whoever wants to cross our borders.

Zeb Colter says our country is our land: To protect and defend because he and Jack Swagger are real patriots, real American, and reminds us: We The People. Jack Swagger starts screaming “WE THE PEOPLE!”

Backstage: Booker T and Teddy Long talk about Jack Swagger and Zed Colter until they’re interrupted by Dolph Ziggler. Dolph complains about Chris Jericho being in the Elimination Chamber and demands to be back in the match to take out Chris Jericho. Big E. Langston reiterates what Dolph says, then has a staredown with Booker T. Booker T decides to put Dolph Ziggler in a match with Kane. Whoever wins is in.

Match 05: The Miz vs. Cody Rhodes

The Miz boots Antonio Cesaro in the head. Cesaro gets up and attacks The Miz from behind.

Winner: The Miz (via DQ)

Post-Match, Antonio Cesaro hits SEVERAL Giant Swings on The Miz.

Courtesy of MillionDollarMoves

Match 06: Primo and Epico vs. Brodus Clay and Tensai

Winner: Brodus Clay and Tensai

Post-Match, Rosa Mendes confronts Naomi but gets attacked by Naomi and Cameron.

The Shield Speaks:

The Shield comes out. Dean Ambrose says The Shield stands united with the sole purpose of shielding the WWE from atrocities like the ones John Cena commits every day (I.E. Threatening The Shield.) Seth Rollins says that unlike Cena, Ryback and Sheamus, The Shield delivers with action and not threats. Roman Reigns says that if Cena, Ryback and Sheamus want them, come get them.

John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus don’t come out. Dean Ambrose says it was an empty threat from three morally empty individuals. Roman Reigns says last week Cena, Ryback and Sheamus tried to bring the entire roster. Reigns claims they could bring the whole world, but The Shield will still be standing. Seth Rollins calls John Cena a failure, saying that he failed last week and he fails every day when he gets up and exists. Rollins says this Sunday, John Cena will fail again at the hands of The Shield.

Dean Ambrose backs Rollins up calling him a failure and says one of the reasons they don’t like John Cena is because of the examples he fails to set. Ambrose says in John Cena’s world there are no consequences, but that’s not the real world, that is #TheJohnCenaProblem.

Roman Reigns says John Cena has been the problem for the past decade then screams that The Shield is the solution. Seth Rollins says that the standard John Cena set paved the way for The Sheamus’ and Ryback’s of the world. Rollins claims its Cena’s fault that an entire generation believes in the system and John Cena.

Seth Rollins says this Sunday they have an opportunity to rectify a decade of injustice in one swoop. Dean Ambrose says this Sunday, The Shield walks in and out together, but John Cena, Sheamus and Ryback might not walk out at all. Ambrose suggests the three of them breathe as much fresh air as they can because The Shield will drown them at Elimination Chamber. Roman Reigns screams “BELIEVE IN THE SHIELD!!” The Shield calls out John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus until the lights go out. When the lights turn back on, John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus are brawling with The Shield.

John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus fight The Shield in the crowd. The Shield eventually retreats as “FEED ME MORE” chants are heard over John Cena’s music.

Match 07: Damien Sandow vs. Alberto Del Rio

Damien Sandow trashes the Nashville fans for their love of country music.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

Post-Match, Alberto Del Rio takes the mic and says Big Show gave the best promo of his life by not saying anything. Del Rio says for the first time in his life, he agrees with Big Show because the time for talking is over. Del Rio says once he finishes Big Show this Sunday, Big Show can do what he wants because after Elimination Chamber, the only place Del Rio is going is Wrestlemania!

Backstage: Bo Dallas attacks Wade Barrett.

Match 08: Kofi Kingston vs. Wade Barrett

Winner: Wade Barrett

Match 08: Dolph Ziggler vs. Kane

Dolph Ziggler accidentally bumps into AJ Lee. Big E. Langston catches him.

Winner: Kane

The Rock Speaks:

The Rock comes out and says his “FINALLY” bit for Nashville. Rock says Nashville is a very special city then proceeds “Storytime with The Rock.” The Rock tells an anecdote about him buying a blue Thunderbird from a crackhead. (Also Jeff Jarrett is mentioned)

CM Punk’s theme plays as he interrupts “Storytime With The Rock.” The Rock mocks CM Punk and Paul Heyman’s friendship saying they were reenacting Twilight. The Rock mentions Paul Heyman’s stipulation and says to “Bring It.” The Rock tells CM Punk he’s going to beat his ass at Elimination Chamber and if Punk walks down the ramp, Rock’s gonna beat his ass in Nashville. CM Punk calls The Rock’s bluff as Paul Heyman says he’s got Punk’s back. Punk and Heyman walk away, but Punk runs back to the ring and starts brawling with The Rock.

The Rock hits CM Punk with the Spinebuster then goes for the People’s Elbow, but Paul Heyman grabs The Rock’s foot.

CM Punk hits the GTS on The Rock

CM Punk picks up the WWE Championship then walks up the ramp with it. CM Punk tells The Rock that storyime’s over and everytime The Rock wants to “bring it” CM Punk’s just going to take it. CM Punk raises the WWE Championship up as Paul Heyman calls Punk “The Best In The World.”

So That Happened:

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