RAW starts off with Stephanie McMahon
QUEEN STEPH
— b. (@brokahontas) October 8, 2013
“THE QUEENDOMMMMMMMMMMMMM! Where the Kings bow downnnnnnnnnnn!”
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon says that last night the WWE Championship match with Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton was ruined. Stephanie understands that the WWE Universe is angry because not only is she angry, but so are Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton and it’s all because of the actions of one selfish man: Big Show. Stephanie McMahon orders Big Show to come to the ring.
The Lioness of the WWE has a Mane going on Right Now. That Means She’s Angry. Look Out, Big Show!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Stephanie’s done her eyeliner. She’s got the wings of fury Show! #RAW
— Rose Butlin (@rose_butlin) October 8, 2013
Big Show tries to explain himself, but Stephanie McMahon tells him to shut up.
Damn! Stephanie McMahon gave Big Show one of those “Larry David” shut ups!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon tells Big Show that she knows he’s been under a lot of pressure lately at home and at work, and says when Big Show is under pressure, he makes bad decisions, but his actions at Battleground were unexcuseable. Stephanie calls Big Show out on his mistakes then asks what he has to say for himself and Big Show says…
Ruff! Ruff! I’m Big Show, the rockin’ dog! #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
That’s not what he actually says, but that would’ve been awesome. Big Show says “Sorry.” Stephanie McMahon mocks his apology then calls him a sorry, pathetic excuse of life. Stephanie McMahon reminds Big Show of all the things the McMahons have done for him. Stephanie says it’s no wonder that Big Show is broke because he can’t manage his finances, his career and he can’t even manage himself.
Stephanie with a terrible impression of Big Show.
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
Big Show says nothing, he only punches in Morse Code now. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
Stephanie tells Big Show that all they’ve asked Big Show to do his do his job, but says he can’t do that. Stephanie McMahon says it’s time for Big Show to man up and take responsibility for his actions. Big Show responds with “Okay. Can I go now?”
“……Okay.” – Big Show (Yup. That’s the appropriate response after a woman crushes your spirit)
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon pokes Big Show and says that he can’t go yet.
Steph POKES.
— Saul Goodman (@RitaHepburn) October 8, 2013
STEPH DONT POKE THE BEAR *cue Knock her out chants* #RAW
— The Mer™ (@mare_bare) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon reminds Big Show that the McMahons don’t just own his home, they own Big Show and that he doesn’t have the right to free will. Stephanie says that Big Show doesn’t do anything in this company unless she and her husband personally approve it.
Wait. Did Stephanie Just Admit to Owning Big Show? Is This DBigShow Unchained?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon demands that Big Show get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness. Big Show doesn’t do it and Stephanie calls him worthless and says he doesn’t have a heart or soul.
Stephanie McMahon: Get Down On Your Knees and Beg Big Show: That First Part’s Gonna Be Kinda Hard, Steph…
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Big Show doesn’t have a soul? Is he a ginger? #raw #wwe
— Katie Donaldson (@_katierose13) October 8, 2013
Big Show’s looking real smug. Big Show’s about to reveal that he won the Powerball Lottery.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
I think Big Show finally looked up the definition of iron clad.
— Diego Violence (@Miss_Dani_Baby) October 8, 2013
Big Show laughs it off then says he’s not begging and tells Stephanie McMahon that he knocked out Randy Orton because he couldn’t take it anymore. As for Daniel Bryan, he knocked him out because Stephanie told him to.
“I Knocked Out Daniel Bryan Because YOU Told Me To!” Well, It’s the Big Snitch!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon claims Big Show is trying to twist the story around and blame Brad Maddox, but Big Show says that Brad Maddox is a puppet that works for her and her “son of a bitch” husband, Triple H.
OHHHHHHHH SNAP
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
Stephanie McMahon slaps Big Show several times and asks him if he’s gonna cry as Big Show laughs it off. Stephanie McMahon asks Big Show what he’s gonna do about it, then says he’s gonna do nothing because he’s fired!
What Are You Gonna Do? *SLAP* You’re Gonna Cry? *SLAP* *SLAP* Stephanie Was Raised on Tough Love; She’ll Teach by Tough Love. #MomOfTheYear
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
When Triple H fires someone its cruel. When Stephanie fires someone its incredibly hot. #WWE #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Big Show walks off having no problem with being fired.
“*To Triple H* Fuck You. *To Orton* Fuck You. *To The Shield* Fuck You. *To Bryan* YOU’RE cool. *To Steph* And Fuck You! I’m out” – Big Show
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 01: Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow
Show……Off time!!
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
Damien Sandow May be the Intellectual Savior for the Unwashed Masses But When He’s Mad, He Grunts Like a Cro-Magnon.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Dolph Ziggler hits the Fame-Asser on Damien Sandow.
Ziggler’s dry hair resembles a packet of Maggi 2 minute noodles. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
Winner: Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler wins with Dad’s finisher! #RAW
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
Damien Sandow Lost to the Rocker Dropper? The Fameasser? Get Your Lavender Trunks Back, Damien. It’s Your Power Color.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Backstage: Stephanie McMahon scolds Brad Maddox saying that she trusted him to do a good job, then runs down the list of everything that went wrong at Battleground. Stephanie McMahon asks Brad Maddox what does he have to say for himself and he responds with Triple H, but Stephanie cuts him off. Stephanie McMahon tells him that he’s lucky that he’s not suffering the same fate as Big Show. Stephanie demands that Brad Maddox issue a public apology to the WWE Universe and make it up to them. Maddox rushes off to do that.
Stephanie McMahon Just Blamed the Blackout on Brad Maddox. That’s Amazing!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
“BRAD! I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLUG YOUR PHONE CHARGER IN THAT OUTLET!” -Stephanie McMahon blaming Maddox for last night’s blackout. #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Bruno Sammartino is shown on the WWE App receiving a Happy Birthday from the WWE Universe.
Bruno Sammartino is 78 years old and can surely kick my ass.
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
Bruno Sammartino getting praised on the WWE App instead of Live TV is just wrong man. #WWE #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
That’s not fair. Most people who watched Bruno Sammartino wrestle don’t know how to use the WWE App.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 02: Aksana, Alicia Fox and Rosa Mendes vs. Natalya, Eva Marie and Jojo
There’s Only One Way to Follow Bruno Sammartino: with Rosa Mendes! Welcome Back, Rosa!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
#AksanaFact: The Lithuanian Nightmare, Aksana once wrestled a llama in a 60 Minute Iron Man Match in her home country. The llama won 6-3.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Wow. Natayla’s pretty much in a handicap match tonight.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
….im scared. #raw #wwe
— Katie Donaldson (@_katierose13) October 8, 2013
Please do not under any circumstances give Natalya a reason to tag out. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
Eva Marie is tagged in:
Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god Oh god
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
This is my nightmare.
— Diego Violence (@Miss_Dani_Baby) October 8, 2013
Eva Marie is going to wrestle. At least she looks good. #raw
— Emile Autouri (@WellYoureWrong) October 8, 2013
Was Eva Marie going for a slutty Judy Jetson look? #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
@prettyheartless Trick Question. Judy Jetson already dressed slutty
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Should have went to Sandra for your attire Eva Marie.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
Boy….what a great haircut Aksana has. #ICantCommentOnAnythingElse
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Eva Marie has had 1 face her whole time in the ring. Apparently Judy Jetson feels no pain. #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
Natalya gets tagged back in:
Whoo! Okay Everyone. Natalya’s Back in the Ring. Wrestling’s Back.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Winner: Natalya (Not a typo)
I already miss A.J dearly. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Brad Maddox walks out.
Brad Maddox coming out to apologize for that Diva’s Match
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Brad Maddox apologizes for the incident that happened at Battleground, then announces a rematch between Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton at WWE: Hell In A Cell…in a Hell In A Cell! Maddox says that to ensure that there is a definitive winner, he will assign a special guest Hall Of Fame Referee. There are 3 Potential Candidates for Special Guest Referee, and it’s up to the WWE Universe to decide via the WWE App. Brad Maddox introduces the first candidate…Booker T.
Well they remembered Booker was still on payroll.
— GOLDLUST (@Osito1034) October 8, 2013
Booker T lobbies to be Special Guest Referee by telling the WWE Universe that they know him, and that they know he’s going to do the right thing for the people, and the right thing for business. Booker T tries to win the poll by saying “CAN YOU DIG THAT, SUCKA?!”
Vote Booker T if you voted for Obama.
— Diego Violence (@Miss_Dani_Baby) October 8, 2013
Booker T promises to do the ring thing for the people, the right thing for business and to make sure we all get Obamacare.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 03: Los Matadoes vs. 3MB
Drew McIntyre’s back! #WheresDrew #TheresDrew!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Time for El Torito!
— GOLDLUST (@Osito1034) October 8, 2013
El Torito is the best.
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
El Torito = ratings
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
Somebody protect Renee Young from this perverted little bull.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Is Jojo El Torito? Is That Why She Didn’t Tag In During The Divas Match?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
God. I love Mini-taur. Can I buy one on WWE Shop yet? #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Winner: Los Matadores
“You mess with the bull, you get the horns” #BreakfastClub
— Diego Violence (@Miss_Dani_Baby) October 8, 2013
#FearTheBull
— b. (@brokahontas) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Heath Slater tries to attack El Torito but gets a hurricanrana for his troubles.
HEATH LANDED ON HIS FACE
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
Give it a few weeks. El Torito will be the next Paul Heyman guy in no time. #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
3MB deserve better than this… Lol nah. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
Paul Heyman Speaks: Paul Heyman calls himself the Best In The World and says reminds everyone that he beat CM Punk with both hands tied behind his back.
“My name is Paul Heyman…and I am the BEST IN THE WORLD….Now these two *Motions to Ryback and Curtis Axel* Not so much.” – Paul Heyman
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Paul Heyman says that he’s the only one who can make that claim, but CM Punk can make the claim that he beat Ryback last night at Battleground, despite cheating. Heyman calls Punk a bully then goes shows the footage of Ryback losing.
Curtis Axel smiling like he’s accomplished something.
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
Curtis “Just happy to be involved” Axel.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Paul Heyman is about to speak again, but he’s cut off by CM Punk.
CM Punk looks like he’s at an 8AM college class on a Friday. #RAW
— Thomas Green (@NotThatTomGreen) October 8, 2013
CM Punk breast cancer a awareness shirt. Really proud of this company.
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
I need that black and pink Punk shirt. Yesterday. #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
CM Punk admits to no wrong doing and says the only thing he did last night was win. Punk says that he kicked Ryback in the balls to see if he had any.
CM Punk. We All Know The Ryback Has Nards. We Remember Last Year’s Hell In a Cell.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Paul Heyman tells CM Punk that he will never do that again, but Punk tells him that his promises mean squat. Punk says that he can and will do it again and by it, he means beat Ryback. CM Punk says that that he assumes that Paul Heyman is out here to issue a rematch, and already accepts the challenge here, tonight or at Hell In A Cell. CM Punk ends his speech by telling Paul Heyman that’s what he gets for trying to bully/pick on someone smarter than them.
“That is What You Get When You’re a Bully and You Pick on Someone SMARTER than You.” CM Punk with the line that’ll get kids beat up tomorrow
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Paul Heyman tells Ryback that CM Punk is bullying him. Ryback tells CM Punk that if Punk had any balls, he would’ve hit him there a long time ago.
That was the best come back you had Ryback?
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
Ryback calls CM Punk out on being a bully again and tells him to walk his skinny little ass in the ring and bully him right now. CM Punk is about to come down to the ring, but R-Truth’s music plays. R-Truth comes out and lobbies to be CM Punk’s Tag Partner. CM Punk accepts.
NO: NOOOOO
— Saul Goodman (@RitaHepburn) October 8, 2013
What are you doing out here, R-Truth? You LOST to Curtis Axel. You LOST! It’s OVER!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 04: CM Punk and R-Truth vs. Curtis Axel and Ryback
Finally, it’s the R-Truth and CM Punk tag team we’ve all been clamoring for. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
Now I’m certain Punk deserves better than this. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
CM Punk, You’re Better Off With a Handicap Match! Natalya Did It Earlier Tonight!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
CM Punk is teaming with the WRONG Black Guy. #WheresKofi
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
@clparty Mark Henry, Kofi Kingston, Darren Young, hell. Justin Gabriel’s South African. I’ll count it. Bring him out.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
CM Punk cleans house.
The Hot Tag Cam needs to be a regular thing.
— David Shoemaker (@AKATheMaskedMan) October 8, 2013
Hey R-Truth! Do Something!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Punk, giving the international sign for “Curtis Axel is boring”…or maybe he’s signaling for the GTS, not sure. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
*The crowd is on fire for CM Punk. CM Punk tags in R-Truth and the crowd immediately gets quiet*
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
CM Punk, realizing that pinning Curtis Axel gives him an IC match, tags in R-Truth.
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
Winner: CM Punk and R-Truth
Thats just like Truth, let Punk do all the work, and then he picks up the pin
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
CM Punk and Natalya should just be a team. They clearly didn’t need their respective tag team partners tonight.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Justin Roberts introduces the next potential candidate for Special Guest Referee…Bob Backlund.
OH GOD IT’S BOB BACKLUND. #RAW
— Drop ToeHold (@Drop_ToeHold) October 8, 2013
Bob Backlund for president. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Bob Backlund is the dud candidate.
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
Booker T: “Bob Backlund? I’ve Got This Special Guest Referee Gig in the Bag. Now Can You Dig That, SUUUCCCCKKKAAA?!?”
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
You gave Backlund a live mic again?!
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) October 8, 2013
Bob Backlund paces around the ring with a microphone before saying that he loves the people and that he has a heck of a reason why they should vote for him. By the way, he uses heck because he doesn’t want to use the word hell or foul language. Backlund’s reasons for wanting to be choses is that he’s been a good guy and bad guy and in the past, and he doesn’t care who wins, as long as he does the best job and that the decision is final. Backlund says that if anyone gets out of control, he will put that person in the Crossface Chicken Wing, then tells the WWE Universe to stand up straight when he addresses them. This summary did the promo no justice.
Aggressive love. Just like dad used to do.
— Spookylad (@TheBarrylad) October 8, 2013
Greatest Promo. Ever. Bob Backlund ladies and gentlemen! #wwe #raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Would this promo be considered a #PrehistoricPipebomb? #WWE #Raw
— Chris Riddle (@ChrisRiddle) October 8, 2013
Bob Backlund is my hero #raw
— Emile Autouri (@WellYoureWrong) October 8, 2013
Bob Backlund’s the kind of guy who yells at squirrels in the park in his spare time.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 05: Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton
Kofi Kingston! Where Were You?!? CM Punk Had to Go Out There BY HIMSELF and Beat The Ryback AND Curtis Axel!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Kofi out here lookin like crazy watermelon.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
If Randy Orton can become the Viper of old, can Kofi Kingston become the Kofi Kingston from November 2009?
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Orton Blocked the S.O.S. and the Trouble in Paradise in Succession?!?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
He’s a slippery devil.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
Kofi Kingston dives at Randy Orton but gets caught mid-air with a powerslam!
GOOD HEAVENS
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
WHAT a POWERSLAM BY RANDY ORTON! I Think Kofi’s Back Tattoos Got Transferred to the Mat!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Randy Orton hits the Kofi Kingston with a vicious DDT on the guardrail!
RIP Kofi’s Brain. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Randy Orton hits the RKO on Kofi Kingston.
Winner: Randy Orton
Well, Kofi, You Tried…
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Daniel Bryan furiously attacks Randy Orton.
Daniel Bryan can not be contained! #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Bryan and Orton’s disagreement over vinyl vs. mp3s has come to a disastrous head. #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
Several WWE Officials try and break up Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton, but Bryan gets the upperhand for most of the brawl.
Bob Backlund is like “Daniel Bryan, calm down bro.”
— Tom (@TomQWood) October 8, 2013
See, Kofi? That’s what you were SUPPOSED to do.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Backstage: Vickie Guerrero scolds a worker about vacation time until Alberto Del Rio walks up.
Since Vickie Guerrero Is In Charge of Smackdown, Is She The Boss of Anyone Wearing a Blue Shirt?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Alberto Del Rio asks if he’s going to be named the new face of the WWE. Vickie laughs but Del Rio says he’s the only champion they have. Del Rio says that he was going to ask for the night off, but since he destroyed RVD, the WWE Universe needs to see their champion. Del Rio tells Vickie Guerrero that he trusts she’ll find the right opponent for him, then starts complimenting Vickie Guerrero. Del Rio flatters Vickie Guerrero further by kissing her on the cheek.
Man. Even Vickie Guerrero doesn’t like Alberto Del Rio.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Thats sexual harrassment Alberto!
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
The 3rd HOFer to vote for is…
I hope 3rd Hall Of Fame choice is Trish Stratus with Baby Max.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Koko B. Ware Should Be the 3rd WWE HOF Candidate for Referee. He Meets the Qualification.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels!
*HBKs theme plays. Booker T throws his ballot down as Bob Backlund puts the guy who asked Vickie for vacation in the Crossface Chicken Wing*
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels Had Pyro. Booker T Didn’t Get Pyro. Bob Backlund Was Wrestling Before Pyro Was Invented; they Called it Gunpowder Back Then.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
WWE really missed the boat not having Drew Carey as an option
— Alex Mack (@failraiser) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels is announced as the 3rd HOFer to vote for. Shawn Michaels talks about how Triple H is his close personal friend, but the keyword in that phrase is personal, but tonight is business. HBK reminds everyone that he trained Daniel Bryan, but he will not let that sway him, nor will he let his friendship with Triple H sway him. As for Randy Orton, they don’t like each other, but he won’t let that sway him either.
I love you, Shawn. I’m still voting for Bob, though!
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
HBK had problems with birds living in his beard, so he shaved.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
HBK asks everyone to download the WWE App and vote for ol’ “HB-Shizzle” because he wants to be the one to get the vote. An HB-Shizzle chant breaks out.
He said HBSHIZZLE.
— Katie Donaldson (@_katierose13) October 8, 2013
SHIZZLE STOPPER! #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
*An HB-Shizzle chant breaks out* Bret Hart: …What else is on? *Switches from RAW to hockey* Ooh. Devils vs. Oilers!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
@KeepItFiveStar and then a HB-shizzle chant breaks out during an oilers power play
— Ed K (@JBLsDragon) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels says wants the WWE Universe to vote for him as Special Guest Referee because he will make sure there is a new WWE Champion. HBK says he doesn’t care if it’s best for Business; he wants what’s best for the WWE Universe.
Shawn Michaels Who Special Guest Ref’d the First Ever Smackdown Main Event and Superkicked the Rock Should Not Be the Referee.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
In his defense, so is everyone. RT @KeepItFiveStar How come no one checks Shawn Michaels’ Resume? He is TERRIBLE at Guest Refereeing.
— David Shoemaker (@AKATheMaskedMan) October 8, 2013
HBK is nice , but I have a feeling in my gut that if I dont vote for Bob Backlund hes going to come to my house and choke me. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels Who Special Guest Ref’d the SummerSlam 97 Main Event and Hit The Undertaker With a Chair Should Not Be the Referee.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels Who Special Guest Ref’d the Triple H / Undertaker Hell in a Cell at WM28 and Superkicked Taker Should Not Be the Referee.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Match 06: Alberto Del Rio vs. ??
Foxy Del Rio! #OnePiece
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) October 8, 2013
It’s announced that Rob Van Dam said on the Battleground Blu-Ray that he needs to “find himself.”
So Rob Van Dam just quit on the Blu-Ray Exclusive?
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Vickie Guerrero introduces Alberto Del Rio’s opponent for the evening, Ricardo Rodriguez…
NO NOT RICARDO!
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
Ricardo. I love you. Be careful. #RAW
— Drop ToeHold (@Drop_ToeHold) October 8, 2013
WHERE ARE THE ZUBAZ? #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
Match 06: Alberto Del Rio vs. Ricardo Rodriguez
Vickie Guerrero also announces that Alberto Del Rio’s opponent for the World Heavyweight Title at Hell In A Cell will be…
But…. but…. CENA JUST LEFT! #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
Cena?! I thought 4-6 months!
— George E. Boy (@NotGeorgieBoy) October 8, 2013
………………………..The report said 4-6 MONTHS, CENA. 4-6 MONTHS!
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
It’s been 2 months since Cena left? Man, time flies when you’re having fun. #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
Cena has that X-factor. He turned down Charles Xavier for Vince McMahon.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) October 8, 2013
If they expect people to Rise Above Cancer, it makes sense to have Cena Rise Above Tennis Elbow. #Edgy
— Christie (@clparty) October 8, 2013
It’s Not Going to Be John Cena, Right? It’s Going to Be El Torito in a Baseball Cap and Some Armbands, Right?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Ricardo Rodriguez rolls up Alberto Del Rio.
Winner: RicRod
The Element of Surprise is So Effective In Wrestling. They Must All Hate Surprise Parties.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Given that RicRod just pinned the world champ, shouldn’t that next title match go to him? #WWE #Raw
— DonnyBrook Boys (@donnybrookboys) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Alberto Del Rio viciously attacks RicRod.
Foxy Del Rio is beating up Usop Rodriguez, someone call Luffy Van Dam. #imastopiswear
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) October 8, 2013
Alberto Del Rio does the Armbreaker in the chair to RicRod.
This attack on RicRod is all John Cena’s fault.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
See What You Did, Cena! See What Acts Are Done in Your Name!?!?!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
At least I can now wear my new shirt that says “If Cena wins, we complain online.” #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
Definitely keen to see Cena rebuild the World Heavyweight Championship. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
I don’t even hate John Cena, but c’mon man. Actually take time off. Watch a TV show or something. Modern Family’s in syndication. Watch that
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
We just reacted to Cena returning as if we had a substitute teacher & had fun for weeks only to find out the real teacher is returning. #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Match 07: Fandango vs. Zack Ryder
A Zack Ryder Match is like a Night Out Clubbing. Everyone Tries to Have a Good Time But It’s Mostly Long Lines for the Bathroom.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Winner: Fandango
Shocker. Ryder loses. Real shocker. It wasn’t a short match.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
Backstage: Booker T, Bob Backlund and Shawn Michaels are shown as the winner of the Special Guest Referee spot at Hell In A Cell is about to be announced.
Look at Shawn Michaels. He’s Going to Superkick Booker T and Bob Backlund Right Now.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Booker is still mad from when Shawn kicked him out of the NWO.
— KH2157EN (@khristheunicorn) October 8, 2013
The winner and Special Guest Referee for Hell In A Cell is….Shawn Michaels!
Well… I am shocked. Shizzled, even. #raw
— Belle Generico (@prettyheartless) October 8, 2013
7 Percent, Booker T? Did Sharmell Vote for Shawn Michaels Too?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
LMAO Booker T is hurt over that 7%
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
Shawn Michaels shakes Bob Backlund’s hand, then Booker T’s. Booker T quickly walks away.
Booker T walked away to cry, 7%? Jeez…
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Match 08: The Real Americans vs. The Great Khali and Santino Marella
Yay! Antonio Cesaro! Boo, Other People In the Ring.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
The Great Khali is Jim Henson’s most elaborate creation ever. #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Antonio Cesaro does the Giant Swing to The Great Khai again!
Cesaro Swing!
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Antonio Cesaro’s Next Feat Of Strength will Be to Giant Swing Himself. Don’t Ask Me How He’ll Do It. He Just Will.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Winner: The Real Americans
ANTONIO CESARO VERSUS ALBERTO DEL RIO! MAKE THE MATCH, VICKIE!
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Fun Fact: All of Antonio Cesaro’s Fanfiction has him doing the Giant Swing to ladies…but with another body part.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Antonio Cesaro does the Giant Swing to Hornswoggle!
Two Cesaro swings are better than one. #RAW
— S[Ta]cey (@LittleSherbie) October 8, 2013
Whee! The People #ImSorry
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, Santino Marella saves Hornswoggle.
WHY YOU GOTTA RUIN IT SANTINO?
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
I wonder if Cesaro could get Big Show or Mark Henry in that swing. #NextLevel
— Not Regal (@RegalSays) October 8, 2013
MizTV with Special Guest: The Miz
The Miz tries to do MizTV but The Wyatt Family comes out.
OMG! YOU GUYS!! They’re setting up Bray Wyatt’s Rocking Chair to feud with The Couch from Miz TV! FINALLY!! YES! YES! YES! Ecstatic. #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Miz TV has been canceled.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
I’m starting to think that Bray Wyatt is “The Cancellation Bear.”
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
The Miz holds his own against the Wyatt Family and manages to escape. Bray Wyatt holds on to Luke Harper and Erick Rowan, bends backwards, then laughs at The Miz.
Don’t hang upside down Bray, your beard looks erect. It’s creepy af.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) October 8, 2013
Match 09: The Shield vs. Cody Rhodes, Goldust and Daniel Bryan
Shield! #houndsofjustice #believeintheShield
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
#RhodesDynasty BRING. IT. ON.
— Shay Mitchell (@ShayLMitchell) October 8, 2013
I LOVE that the Most Dangerous Man in the WWE is a 5’8″ Gnome with a Lumberjack Beard and a Penchant for Kale.
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Fun fact – Dr. Shelby cured Goldust’s stuttering problem. #RAW
— Adam Lucidi (@adamlucidi) October 8, 2013
Cody’s moonsault might be the best in the game today
— Randy Wilder (@InstantRandy) October 8, 2013
Dean Ambrose hits Cody Rhodes with a chair. The Shield gets disqualified, but Triple H restarts the match and makes it a No Disqualification Match.
Triple H Anywhere Near Ringside isn’t #BestforBusiness; It’s #BadforBryan
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Randy Orton comes from out of nowhere and RKO’s Daniel Bryan.
Where the hell did Randy Orton come from? Nowhere, duh. #RAW
— Drop ToeHold (@Drop_ToeHold) October 8, 2013
Randy Orton just did one of those Vine Magic Tricks to appear in front of Daniel Bryan and RKO him.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013
Winners: The Shield
“YYEEEEEEAAAAAAH” – #SethRollinsVoice
— Angélica Stark (@angie_chipz) October 8, 2013
Post-Match, The Shield and Randy Orton attack Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes and Goldust. Suddenly, Big Show’s theme plays.
WWE superstars can’t sneak anywhere, their entrance music always plays.
— hates rednail polish (@YourBoyDrew) October 8, 2013
They Didn’t Even Let Big Show Put On His Street Clothes? He’s had To Walk Around Pittsburgh in Blue Camo Tights?
— ThreeManBooth (@3ManBooth) October 8, 2013
Big Show fends off The Shield then gets face to face with Triple H.
oh my what a punch! that was awesome! #RAW
— The Mer™ (@mare_bare) October 8, 2013
Triple H hasnt been hit like that since Curtis Axel dropkicked him to retirement. #wwe #Raw
— Ryan Shell (@DAsharpshooters) October 8, 2013
Daniel Bryan gets back in the ring and grabs Triple H’s tie.
Daniel Bryan stands over Triple H and chants “YES!” with the WWE Universe.
@WWEDanielBryan Tap dance on his face.
— Christie (@clparty) October 8, 2013
Daniel Bryan smiling and standing over a knocked out Triple H. Now that’s how you end #Raw. #WWE
— Scott M. Fishman (@smFISHMAN) October 8, 2013
So That Happened:
Watched #Raw with my mom, who hadn’t watched #WWE in yrs but instantly became a @WWEDanielBryan fan when he tagged into the main event.
— Craig Tello (@craigtello) October 8, 2013
That was a long time coming. Okay RAW but really needed a better crowd.
— Max Hunter (@KickStunner) October 8, 2013
Dear WWE, Never come back to Pittsburgh.
— Langdon Alger (@KeepItFiveStar) October 8, 2013